


First Impressions are Temporary

by adVENTitiious



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 09:52:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4343933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adVENTitiious/pseuds/adVENTitiious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus Lupin finally works up the nerve to take his live-in boyfriend, Sirius Black, home to meet his parents. What could go wrong? AU. Spaz(ish) Sirius warning. </p><p>Absolute fluff and silliness, because it was needed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Impressions are Temporary

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SableUnstable](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SableUnstable/gifts).



"Moony?"

An eighteen-year-old Remus Lupin lay on the floor of his childhood room, pointedly ignoring Sirius Black, his boyfriend of nine months. He couldn't believe all what had happened earlier that day.

He didn't know what the wizard had been thinking honestly.

"Moony?"

Remus let out a slow breath. He'd told Sirius that they needed to be careful around his extremely old-fashioned parents, and now—now, he was _screwed_. Remus John Lupin - as his mother had called him only half an hour earlier while his dad sat silently, looking about to explode - was in a load of trouble.

"Why are you lying on the floor? There's plenty of space up here."

Remus sighed and fluffed his too thin pillow, and tried to block out the discomfort in his right shoulder and hip as he lay on the hardwood with only his sleeping bag to cushion him. There had once been a thick rug covering most of the room's floor, but his mother had removed it the Christmas before, saying it needed replaced; unfortunately she hadn't gotten to it just yet. He shifted roughly, and his little toe caught on the leg of the desk chair. "Shit."

"Everything okay down there?"

He rubbed his sore toe on the calf of his leg, trying to calm down the smarting appendage. He should have let Sirius sleep on the floor. But, _no_ —A creaking and then a soft thud behind him belayed his thoughts. He resisted saying anything as he felt a body scoot closer to him.

"I've come to join you. And I've brought your teddy." The words were whispered.

Remus resisted the urge to smile as his childhood teddy bear was settled against his chest. He wrapped a hand around it and felt his resolve begin to turn to mush. No. No, Sirius would _not_ tease him out of his bad mood. He would wallow and pout if he wanted to. And he really wanted to. He said nothing.

"This is a bit unpleasant, Moony," Sirius whispered in the boy's ear in front of him. "Your floor is rather hard."

"Well then sleep on the bloody bed. I didn't invite you down here," Remus mumbled, his words coming out too kind for his liking. He was already caving. What was wrong with him? This is how he had gotten into trouble in the first place.

"Are you upset with me?" Sirius asked softly, his arm wrapping around the wizard's side as he nestled closer, trying to share Remus's pillow with him. He hadn't had the foresight to bring his own from the bed. "Scoot up a bit," he whispered as he nudged the back of Remus's head with his nose.

Remus sighed and lifted his head and pushed the pillow back some before dropping it once more. "There. Happy?"

Sirius's arm wrapped tighter around him. "A little bit," he admitted. "But, maybe if-" His hand slid up onto Remus's bare shoulder and then began to slide forward onto his chest as he nuzzled the back of his neck - and then _ever_ so carefully his hand began to slip down his stomach.

Remus caught the errant hand just before it could reach his pajamas. "No. There is _no_ way. Not after what all happened today."

* * *

"Thank you so much for having me, Mrs. Lupin," Sirius said five hours earlier with a wide smile as he lifted the woman's offered hand. He leaned over slightly to place a gentle kiss on it as he stood in the Lupin sitting room dressed in his nicest pair of black slacks and a deep red button up, the one that Remus had always said showed off his dark features admirably. "I see now where Remus got his looks."

Remus's mother smiled warmly at the tall, dark-haired wizard, her hazel eyes twinkling with mirth. "You are quite welcome. I am so happy to finally meet you. Remus has told us so little about you, Mr. Black."

"Sirius, please," he said as he released the woman's hand. He looked over at his boyfriend, who was shooting him an arched look. He had forgotten something. Think. Think. His eyes widened with realization. _More compliments, right_. He looked around the modest but impeccably kept sitting room. "Your house is lovely, Mrs. Lupin. How many house elves do you keep?"

The woman blinked. "Oh, oh none. I keep it up myself," she said, smiling again once she had answered.

Sirius's eyebrows shot up. "You _clean_?" he asked with no small amount of disbelief. He couldn't imagine his own mother lifting a hand to do anything with regards to Twelve Grimmauld Place but to snap her fingers for an elf.

Remus smiled tightly, his expression bordering the line of a grimace. He cleared his throat. "What's for dinner, Mum? It smells delicious, is that quail?"

His mother nodded. "It is. When your father told me you were coming and bringing along your _friend_ ," she said, shooting a smile at Sirius, who smiled back winningly, before turning back to Remus. "I had to make it. I know it's your favorite."

Sirius looked between the smiling mother and son, a look of confusion slowly taking over his features. "Wait. You cook _too_? How do you manage all that? I thought you were a muggle."

The room went completely silent.

* * *

"This is delicious, Mrs. Lupin," Sirius said politely before taking another bite of the food called quail. "What is it exactly?"

"Quail? It's a type of bird," the woman explained with a curious expression as she placed a basket of hot rolls on the dining room table beside Remus. "I'm glad you like it."

Sirius stopped chewing. He forced the bite down. "Ah," he said as he felt the swallowed food begin to try to make its way back up his throat. "Bird. Yum," he said and then looked back down at his plate more skeptically as he tried to figure out what else might be a form of meat; he should've known it was too good to be tofu or something of the sort.

"Is there something wrong?"

"No. No, not at all," Sirius said, attempting to subtly scoot the quail away from the mashed potatoes and green beans. He eyed the casserole warily, his gaze narrowing at the mixed concoction, and then scooted it beside the quail. He wasn't taking any chances.

"It's nothing, Mum. Sirius has just not been eating meat is all," Remus explained quickly.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," the woman said in a rush as she sat down in the chair across from Remus. "I had no idea."

Sirius pushed a string bean to the meat's side, a strand of something white on it giving away that it had indeed been getting friendly with the quail earlier. He looked up and forced a smile. "Not a problem, Mrs. Lupin. I only just started a few days back."

Remus shook his head silently as his mother's eyebrows shot up, and then she asked, "Oh? Might I ask what brought about the change?"

Sirius set his fork down as he considered how best to answer the question, a shadow of anxiety beginning to prickle at his chest. "Well, ah, you see, it's really been an issue for quite a while now, ever since I - I began to relate more closely with dogs."

Remus choked on a large bite of quail.

* * *

" _Why_ in the bloody hell did you tell her that?" Remus asked in complete dismay, his very step agitated as he walked at a fast pace, his boyfriend following silently by his side down the quiet street from his house. And he had thought the ambiguous animal comment had been bad.

They passed house after house, his neighbors all inside, eating dinner most likely. _Dinner_. His jaw clenched. He wasn't going back. There was no way. He and Sirius could have their bags collected by someone. James. James would _surely_ get them for him, and they could just apparate once they-

Sirius shrugged one shoulder. "It was to salvage the dinner. Things weren't going as well as I had planned. Don't worry so much, Remus, it's not a big deal."

Remus stopped suddenly. " _Sirius_. You told my mum that you top!"

Sirius turned around. He thought for a way to get out of what he had said. "No. No I didn't. What I said was - I _usually_  do, but that for you I was willing to switch off." He reached out to pull the wizard into a hug.

Remus shook his head, a hand outstretched to keep the wizard at arm's length. " _Why_ did you tell her that?"

Sirius held back a grimace as his hands dropped by his side. Why indeed. It had been word vomit, induced by stress. Stress that had been coupled with anxiety. But not just _any_ anxiety, a _crushing_ anxiety that had made him want to jump up and run out of the room, and it had taken over his mouth when he had kept himself firmly planted. "I just wanted her to know that I care about you, Remus."

Remus began to laugh, the sound loud and more like Sirius's than the dark-haired wizard was comfortable acknowledging. "This was a bad idea. A _very_ bad idea. You are _not_ allowed to talk to my dad when he gets home. In fact, we're leaving _now_." He began to walk again.

Sirius jogged forward a few steps, grabbing his arm. "Remus, _wait_. I'll be good. Please. I - I _need_ to meet your father. It's _important_ ," he said, his tone insistent as he remembered the entire reason for their trip. Well, his reason at least.

He wanted for Remus's parents to like him, so that he and Remus could live together happily. Not that they weren't already, because they were, and had been for months, but Sirius wanted to remove any stresses for Remus's sake. He could tell it had been bothering him, the werewolf saying his parents wanted to see his new place but then putting them off, because they hadn't even met Sirius yet.

Remus sighed and shook his head. "Do I want to know why? And if it's because you want to tell him that you are willing to suck me off I will not understand."

"No, no, of course it's not." Sirius shot the wizard a disconcerted look. "Why would I tell your father that?"

* * *

"Sorry, Mum. We just went to get some fresh air," Remus said as he stepped back inside his house five minutes later. He shut the door quietly and then stepped out of his loafers, pushing them against the wall neatly as Sirius leaned down to unlace his shoes that he had ordered specially just for their trip.

His mother smiled, her expression strained as she wiped her hands on an apron she had put on while they had been out. "Not a problem, dear," she said softly, placing a small kiss on Remus's cheek, the boy flushing but looking very relieved at the same time. Her smile relaxed as she turned to a hesitant Sirius. "Sirius, would you care for some dessert?"

Sirius glanced over to Remus for guidance. The werewolf nodded in encouragement. "Yes," he said eagerly, pleased he could do something right. He looked back over to the woman. "I would like crème brûlée with some fresh, thinly-sliced strawberries and a sprig of mint. Be careful not to burn the sugar though."

* * *

 Remus and Sirius were inside a small bathroom by the entryway. Sirius was sitting on the closed toilet with an unsure look settled around his mouth and eyes as Remus leaned over the basin and whispered curses.

"Was it something I said?" Sirius asked quietly as he studied his upset boyfriend. He had barely gotten his dessert order out when Remus had drug him away and into the bathroom. He had been about to add to his request a few blueberries. He sighed. "I'm sorry Remus," he tried.

Remus shook his head. "No. This is all my fault. I should have known. How did I not realize this would happen? I blame myself really."

Sirius nodded, his hand reaching up and settling on his boyfriend's tense one. He gave it a gentle squeeze. "It's okay. I forgive you, Remus."

The sandy blond closed his eyes slowly. "I'm _not_  in the _mood_ for your jokes _tonight_ ," he said, his words coming out slow and measured as if he was struggling with some strong emotion.

Sirius removed his hand. "Right. Sorry."

Remus stood upright and stared into the mirror, letting out a slow breath through his nose, his expression hardening with a look of raw determination. "All right. We've only a few hours until bedtime. My father won't be here for an hour and with settling in and whatnot that really only leaves an hour with him." He turned to his boyfriend. " _Promise_ me you won't say anything incriminating about us. No intimate details. Nothing."

Sirius nodded slowly, his lips pushed tightly between his teeth. "You have my word."

Remus sighed, his posture relaxing. "Good. Let's go have dessert." He shook his head, and a dry laugh bubbled from his lips.

The dark-haired wizard stood up quickly as Remus pulled the door open. "Actually, I need to take a slash first," he said.

Remus nodded and pulled the door shut behind him. Sirius walked over and cast a locking charm on the door before reaching into his front slacks pocket. He pulled out a small, blue pill, holding it between his fingers as he thought.

It was like taking a calming potion, James had said. But better. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as the blue pill stared up at him. He didn't want to let Remus down, and James had taken one to meet Lily's parents, the witch herself having given it to him. He turned the water on to the basin and popped the pill onto his tongue before leaning over and taking a drink to wash it down.

* * *

"Well. That went well," Remus said with a hopeful smile as he stood beside Sirius in the family room after having their desserts - which to Sirius's initial surprise was _not_ crème brûlée but rather apple pie and vanilla ice cream. He had realized his mistake when the woman began to apologize profusely, saying she didn't have the proper ingredients for what he had wanted.

"My father should be here soon..."

Sirius smiled easily. He could tell the pill had taken effect. He had almost made the mistake of discussing with Remus's mother the fact that his great great uncle's favorite pie was meat pie, until the Ministry outlawed the usage of muggle meat in it, as had been popular amongst purebloods in the 1840's. That would have been bad. She _was_ a muggle after all. Yes, he was feeling considerably more at ease.

"Sirius? Sirius, did you hear me?"

The tall wizard looked over to Remus. Had he said something? His boyfriend's expression was slowly dropping and shifting to one of concern as his dark blond eyebrows furrowed. He spoke up, "What's that?"

Remus took a step closer, and Sirius's eyes dropped to tempting lips. "Sirius. Is something wrong? You look a little-" his words were cut short by the entrance of his father.

"Dad... it's so good to see you," Remus said in an overly cheerful tone, a tension dancing around his words and filling in the spaces between as well as his boyfriend's chest unexpectedly despite the calming pill.

"Remus, you made it," the man greeted his son with a smile, clapping him on the shoulder warmly and then ruffling his hair. He then shifted to face the stressed grey-eyed wizard as Remus smoothed his hair. "You must be Sirius," the man said, his voice suddenly deeper and his gaze reserved as he held a glass of scotch in his outstretched hand.

Sirius nodded, his expression flooding with relief. "Yes, thank you so much, Mr. Lupin," he said, taking the glass from the man. "I needed this," he said and then downed half the drink.

* * *

"Remus, I think everything went great," he said as he fiddled with the tattered ear of Remus's teddy bear. Perhaps drinking with the pill James had given him hadn't been the best idea ever. "No one tried to kill me, and here we are together - maybe not comfortable - but you know, that could be easily remedied if you'd just-"

" _Sirius_!" Remus hissed, not wanting to wake his parents, whose room was only separated from his by a small study. He rolled over to face him. "How can you even say that? Do you not remember what you said to my dad?"

* * *

"Another drink, Sirius?" Remus's father asked coolly as he watched the wizard take his last sip of scotch.

Remus was standing with his eyebrows furrowed, and he was chewing on his bottom lip like he had just seen a puppy murdered and then brought back to life only to watch it be murdered all over again.

Sirius shot him a questioning look before nodding agreeably. "Yes, thank you." He handed the older wizard his empty glass and let out a chuckle. "You know, Remus was so worried about me meeting you. I have no idea why."

"Neither do I." The older man turned to his son with a stony expression. "Remus, come help me freshen your _friend's_ drink - and then we can move out to the patio."

Remus nodded, his gaze dropping to the floor. "Yes, Sir."

* * *

Remus and Sirius sat down at the patio table across from Remus's father.

"Where's Mum?" Remus asked as he bounced his left knee while holding a glass of untouched iced tea, his gaze darting around the backyard garden.

"She's making coffee," his father replied tersely.

Remus nodded quickly. "Ah, yes, maybe I should go help then, Sirius, come on, you can help too." He moved to stand up.

"Sit, Remus," the man said, causing his son to drop back into the seat.

The three wizards sat quietly for a few moments.

"So... how did you two start dating?" his father asked, his tone reminding Remus of only a few but very memorable conversations all of which had been doomed from the start. Remus, how did all these 'R's' end up on the wall in red crayon? And... Did you eat all your Easter chocolate before breakfast? Or... Remus, did you throw away the book your aunt bought you for your birthday?

Remus shifted in his seat. It had been a horrible book to his defense. Who wanted to read a story about a boy, whose two dogs died prematurely and of terrible causes? "Well, we, ah..."

"Let me tell it, Remus," Sirius said in a slow voice, his hand settling on his boyfriend's tensed thigh in a soothing gesture.

"No-no, I know it much better-"

Sirius laughed. "I doubt tha-"

" _Sirius_ -"

"Remus, don't be rude," the older wizard chastised his son, "Let your guest talk."

Remus blinked slowly - and then nodded, the action appearing to cause him physical pain. "Sorry." He turned to Sirius and said in a subdued tone, "Go ahead - Sirius."

Sirius nodded eagerly as he took another sip of his drink before setting it down on the glass top. "You see. I was with my girlfriend in the common room after a Quidditch win against Slytherin," he started, Remus's eyes widening in disbelief. "And she was on my lap, and we were snogging. And well, my eyes met Remus's across the room and suddenly I-"

"Broke up with her," Remus said quickly, cutting him off. He shot his boyfriend a harsh look, his gaze wide and lips pressed firmly together as he shook his head ever so slightly.

Sirius let out a barking laugh, not seeming to notice the werewolf's dark expression. "Yeah, after I came in my pants. She was-"

* * *

"Remus. He's a guy. He knows how that goes," Sirius said softly, privately regretting his words more than should be possible, with his mind having cleared a considerable amount. Remus's father had looked livid. He wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer. "He came around after that though, remember? We talked about Quidditch for a good half hour," he insisted and then placed a chaste kiss on his nose. "And, well... I'm sure the shower 'incident' - they won't even remember it in a few days."

Remus pressed his lips together stubbornly when soft lips grazed them tentatively. "Maybe a week," was murmured in a rough voice and then talented lips went to work on his jaw line. "At most a month," the whispered words slipped into his ear before teeth and lips began to take turns nibbling and caressing his neck respectively.

"At most," Remus agreed in begrudging amusement despite himself, the right corner of his mouth pushing up as he felt himself begin to relax into the gentle touches. He breathed in deeply, Sirius's warm scent filling his senses, and his eyes fell shut when a hand cupped his backside, pulling him closer to his boyfriend's pajama clad lower half.

"Everything will be fine," Sirius insisted as his hand drifted lower, "I promise. As long as we have each other. It'll all work out. You'll see."

Remus nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, you're right," he breathed out before pressing his lips against Sirius's.

* * *

 The Shower 'Incident'

"Remus, I found you," Sirius said with a cheerful smile as he stood, holding back the shower curtains.

"Sirius, what are you doing in _here_?" Remus inexplicably tried to cover himself with his hands, feeling oddly embarrassed as he stood in front of his boyfriend, who had seen him in much more compromising positions.

Sirius grinned and pulled his shirt off over his head, letting it drop to the floor. "I need to clean up too. Water conservation and all that jazz," he said in a poorly-veiled husky voice as he unbuttoned his slacks and then let them drop unceremoniously to the floor. His tongue darted out and wet his lips when he noticed the sandy blond watching him, his expression clearly shifting to one with which Remus was intimately familiar.

"You want to shower with me?" Remus asked his barely-clad boyfriend unnecessarily.

Sirius nodded, his eyes shifting down to land on Remus's hands which were no longer able to conceal him fully. His gaze flicked back up to study the werewolf, his usually sandy locks clinging to his face and looking almost a dark brown as they dripped with water. "Yeah. Can I?"

Remus shot a nervous glance over at the door.

"I locked it."

Remus sighed and began to nod. "Yeah, all right. But, we can't do anything."

Sirius pushed down his boxers, and they fell to the floor, joining the rest of his clothes. He grinned, stepping out of them and then into the bathtub. He pulled Remus closer with one hand and tugged the curtain shut with the other. His grin grew as he looked down at him. "Need some help?"

Remus swallowed hard. "Help?"

Sirius nodded in an innocent fashion and picked up a bottle of shampoo. "Yeah, I'm an expert at this. I've been cleaning myself for years."

Remus quirked a smile as Sirius squeezed out a dollop and then shot him an expectant look. He laughed softly and lowered his chin towards his chest, and then fingers began to run through his hair, massaging his scalp as hot water ran down his back, making circles along sore temples. "That's nice," he murmured and then sniffed. "I think that's my mum's."

"That would explain the strawberry scent." Sirius's hands ran down to his neck and slid up and down his tense muscles a few times before tapping his head. "Okay, rinse."

Remus stepped back and tipped his head up, letting the water run over his hair, and felt a hand begin to trail at a teasing pace down his chest, stopping at his stomach to trace stars and sending jolts of excitement even further downward. He took a small step forward, his eyes opening and barely making out Sirius in front of him through the water.

"My turn." Sirius grabbed the bottle of shampoo beside the one he had just used and poured some into his hand before shifting around Remus with an easy grin and positioning himself under the shower head.

Remus shook his head and watched as the wizard washed his hair, his irritation slowly shifting to amusement when the wizard began cursing when he got soap into his eyes and then bumped into the unfamiliar wall when he tried to turn around with his eyes still closed.

"There. How do I look?" Sirius asked, his hair hanging in his eyes, obscuring them partially as water ran down his nose and over his full lips.

"Like a wet dog," Remus said matter-of-factly and then leaned in and captured the wizard's mouth with his own.

Sirius wrapped his arms around the werewolf's waist and pulled him under the shower's stream with him. He grinned against his lips. "I thought this wasn't allowed."

Remus laughed. "It's not," he said and then his hand slid between them.

"Oh shit. _Yes_ ," Sirius whispered as he leaned his forehead against Remus's. He tilted his head to the side and met Remus's lips gently. "That's so _good_ —"

"Remus honey, I was just wondering if-"

Remus pulled back from Sirius quickly at the sound of his mother's voice filling the bathroom. Shit. Shit. _Shit_. "I'm sorry. What was that, Mum?" he asked, grimacing as he waited for a response, picturing the two distinct piles of clothes that were laying on the bathroom floor.

"I-I brought you a towel. I'll go get one for Sirius too," she said, her voice sounding higher-pitched than usual.

"Thank you, Mrs. Lupin," Sirius replied loudly as he grinned apologetically at the scowling sandy blond, and when the door clicked added in a softer, more hesitant voice, "Guess I _didn't_ lock it."

Remus let out an incredulous laugh. "No, I guess you didn't."


End file.
